Dad, It’s Time To Tell The Truth!
Reviewed by Carol Hoyer, PhD, for Reader Views (06/10)
Let’s face it- as parents, we lie to our children, especially when divorce is imminent and the two individuals cannot come to terms. No one ever said divorce was easy and when two people constantly try to get revenge or control of the other person, either through guilt or nasty accusations, it gets worse.
Healing from a divorce is not easy, and telling your child, or children, about what really happened will cause a lot of heartache, pain and a downward slope for some children.
Tony Rassini has written a wonderful book on what he did to save his relationships; poor as they may have been and admit to things he did to sabotage those relationships. It is not a “woe is me book,” it is an honest account of how he tried things that backfired, and how his children didn’t trust him. There are things we do, as the author says, that do not benefit our children. At one point, we are only looking at ourselves and not the big picture.
This is a true account of what happened to Tony as a father and potential divorcee regarding child visitation, show causes to the court and manipulation by two parents. It is a very enlightening view on the courts and what they see or only want to see. If you have ever been in this situation, you will learn many truths about the court system and CPS (Child Protective Services). Tony gives some great suggestions on how the courts could change some of their policies. It will make you look at what one needs to do to fight the system.
Not only is this about divorce, but Tony talks about his own addictions (and we all have them) and how it impacted his life in relationship to his children. Children know when either parent is lying or trying to be in control. If you don’t believe that, then you need to read this book. It’s not only about those couples who are married, but it is information that one can take into living-together relationships. From my own experience as a Psychologist, I see this every day, including one of my own family members. “Dad, It’s Time To Tell The Truth!” is a book that I have put on Resources-Reading for my Psychology college students.