“The Kid Code” by Brenda Miller

The Kid Code: 30 Second Parenting Strategies

Brenda Miller
Balboa Press (2021)
ISBN 9781982269500
Reviewed by Rachel Dehning for Reader Views (01/2022)

“The Kid Code” by bestselling author Brenda Miller is the latest and greatest parenting book! Not only does it assist parents to better understand and handle their child(ren), but it also doubles as a self-help guide for comprehending and managing yourself as the parent when you feel like throwing a bigger tantrum than your child. When you notice yourself starting to lose control, a small part of you already knows that nothing good will come of your fit. However, a larger part wants nothing to do with common sense and feels stressed to the max. Brenda Miller explains right away the driving force behind the book: minimizing and then disposing stress in our lives. She also mentions that if you take the time to study your child, you will notice that children inherently have no stress because they have not been conditioned to believe in or react to this still unknown emotion. And let’s face it, wouldn’t we all be happier and more carefree if it were possible to be more like our kids?

Miller presents information dan data from some of the “masters” who have either lived without stress or found a way to manage it—influential spiritual leaders, with Gandhi, Buddha, Guy Finley, and Jesus being some of the ones included. Throughout the book, you will find a combination of chapters detailing facts regarding stress, and “30 Second Parenting Strategies” to try with your child(ren) to determine what works best for you and your family. Much of the book centers around themes of grace, self-acceptance, and blessings from a spiritual perspective to help all readers discover ways of bringing peace back into their household when it was not thought to be possible.

“The Kid Code” can be helpful to many readers because it causes us to humble ourselves and strip away any ego and pride that still lingers, thanks to our society that has brainwashed us to think we have to be better, richer, or faster than others. The main point of the book is clear and available straight away so there’s no wondering or guessing, and Miller includes findings that support her chapters and ideas. I found one statement particularly interesting: “Negativity is biologically addictive and habitual.” After reading this line I thought of several people, and their negativity began to make sense. When Miller spoke about beliefs versus truths, it was eye-opening to realize I’d never thought of that on my own.

The overall work put into creating this book is commendable, and I hope that many homes will change for the better because of “The Kid Code.” As a Christian, it was disheartening to me to read of Jesus as simply being “one of the masters” instead of “THE master,” but I understand that the author is either writing from her personal belief to be inclusive or for the sake of her audience. The idea of spiritual parenting is heavy throughout the book, with talk of “Divine Intelligence,” “our True Inner Self,” and “blessing our mistakes” being prominent themes. From a parenting perspective, there is some good material here that you’ll find both informative and experiential to suit yourself and/or your family.

Miller writes to the general audience with simple language and, when needed, offers step-by-step instructions of how to successfully utilize the “30 Second Parenting Strategies.” I do like that she began with information, expanded into strategies, and then continued by supporting her ideas and processes with the information that preceded them. The research was well done and the presentation was organized and easy to understand.

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