You Can’t Leave the House Naked
Lindsey Bernay
No Such Word Publishing (2023)
ISBN: 979-8989399802
Reviewed by Julie Kestner for Reader Views (05/2024)
Dressing on purpose is the empowered message woven throughout the fabric of “You Can’t Leave the House Naked: Uncover Your Power by Living and Dressing on Purpose” by Lindsey Bernay. This treasure trove of self-development offers a thoughtfully curated collection of reflective “Try This On” exercises, client-focused “Styling Stories,” and author-advice-inspired “Lindsey’s Tips.” With expertise and authority, Bernay catwalks readers through a 10-day realization practice designed to transform the way anybody can show up for themselves. A top industry-leading luxury stylist who has outfitted thousands of women, Bernay helps clients discover and hone their personal power by dressing with more intention.
Bernay’s voice is honest and acknowledging with a touch of in-it-with-you humor. From the first page, she addresses the possibility that the entire concept of this book might be a hard “no” for some readers at a glance. Yet, in the seconds it takes to get to the bottom of the page, Bernay reframes this potentially pretentious subject matter into a tuned-in, can-do commitment by asserting in the foreword, “It’s time to put yourself at the top of your to-do list, so let’s go … ”
In true personal-growth fashion, Bernay presents the framework of the book in three concise thoughts aimed to inspire grounding, intention-setting, and action-taking:
1. Your day starts in your closet.
2. What you say to yourself in the morning sets the foundation for your day.
3. YOU CAN’T LEAVE THE HOUSE NAKED. (pg. 13-14)
Along with these themes, the concept of the Happy Closet comes into play, and Bernay introduces it in her intuitive I-know-what-you’re-thinking style. She declares that the term “happy” can be annoying because it can make anyone who isn’t experiencing happiness feel kind of … unhappy. After clearing the air about that, she distinguishes that a closet is one place where happy can live, and further explains,
Your Happy Closet is the place you go to make choices about who you are at that very moment. And because you are a dynamic, evolving force of nature, your Happy Closet will evolve and change with you. (pg. 130)
What’s more, Bernay’s enthusiasm for a Happy Closet is contagious. Readers may find themselves envisioning the colors, materials, textures, and patterns of today-ready pieces perfectly suited for people of all walks—and readers may also experience the feelings of inner peace, comfort, excitement, and confidence that go along with creating a personal Happy Closet.
Another concept that Bernay explores is the all-too-common “I don’t have anything to wear” predicament of looking into a full closet and thinking that nothing within it is quite right. Although I can definitely relate, I also think having a closet full of clothes with nothing to wear is quite a luxurious “problem,” or more accurately, situation. Bernay speaks to this in a “Try This On” exercise that involves saying thank you to all your clothes, from splurges on down to your socks. As the book progresses, some of the exercises and personal tips are what resonated most with me.
On a similar thread, one more “Try This On” exercise that I found helpful, and think readers might, too, includes designating a “Memory Clothes” box for clothing items that have sentimental value, but you no longer wear. This allows you to keep pieces you can’t part with yet but remove them from your closet so that the only items remaining are the ones you can wear for who you are today.
Some readers might also identify with one of “Lindsey’s Tips” on eliminating excuses for saving an outfit for the perfect occasion. Bernay is right there with her clients who have done this, as she’s done it as well, and understands the reasoning behind it. However, without judgment, she points out that in conserving favorite pieces, you can completely miss out on the opportunity to wear them, so why not make today the day when you show up purposefully for yourself by wearing them?
Like a closet full of feel-good pieces, this book is brimming with contemplative points and questions posed to help you recognize and tap into your personal power, prioritize your well-being, and clear out any lingering physical and mental clutter so that you can make way for a new, purposeful way of living.
Bernay’s overarching message is to honor yourself for who you are today while holding space for the possibilities of tomorrow, and readers will likely receive it as powerful, positive, and encouraging. As Bernay provides readers with in-the-know suggestions and doable action steps that can serve far beyond 10 days, she delivers on her mission, listed in her author’s note, to “change the way women approach their day, starting with their wardrobe.”
Just as a simple accessory can tie together an entire outfit, Bernay does the same with this take on what can unfold when people transform into exactly who they want to be:
When you deliberately present yourself to the world with intention—as you see yourself and as you wish to be seen—something truly magical happens. You become a beacon, a guiding light, that beckons and draws toward you everything you want to manifest in your life. (pg. 130)
Whether you’re actively working on your personal development or would simply enjoy a well-intentioned, uplifting read, I recommend Lindsey Bernay’s “You Can’t Leave the House Naked.”
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